but I am not sure.
Here's my problem... It isn't the E or the N or the J, but the F. Sometimes, I am a big heart, but other times I am a big brain. Sometimes, I am more comfortable being that big brain, but I feel I am actually this big heart.
Of course, this DOES translate into the... whatever my life has become as of late... this schism between head and heart, but... when I read about ENFJ's, I feel I am reading about myself -- the self most people don't see, the self people see only in my closest relationships (which are all that I have at the moment at my own devising), the self at what I feel is it's most authentic.
But I do share things with ENTJ's... like the mind that won't shut up or slow down and runs circles around other people. However, I do repress a lot of what I think out of concern for other people -- they might not be able to take it or be ready and so I wait until it is ready to be said -- I trust myself not to forget. I do tend to think I know what the people around me need and I do hate being alone and tend to expend a lot of energy taking care of the people around me (and yes, to the detriment of my own health... a year ago, I found myself in crisis).
It's the thinking thing... does feeling mean you don't think? How does that work out anyway?
I am not as goal-oriented as ENTJs seem to be... I have a plan that I then worry and fret won't work because I am not certain I am doing enough because I am communicating with folks on-line, making sure of my long-distance friendships, etc.
So, I guess I am supposed to get out (hee!), but from where I was certain, I feel a degree of... what if...and I'd like some help, if you good folks don't mind.
Heart,
Here's my problem... It isn't the E or the N or the J, but the F. Sometimes, I am a big heart, but other times I am a big brain. Sometimes, I am more comfortable being that big brain, but I feel I am actually this big heart.
Of course, this DOES translate into the... whatever my life has become as of late... this schism between head and heart, but... when I read about ENFJ's, I feel I am reading about myself -- the self most people don't see, the self people see only in my closest relationships (which are all that I have at the moment at my own devising), the self at what I feel is it's most authentic.
But I do share things with ENTJ's... like the mind that won't shut up or slow down and runs circles around other people. However, I do repress a lot of what I think out of concern for other people -- they might not be able to take it or be ready and so I wait until it is ready to be said -- I trust myself not to forget. I do tend to think I know what the people around me need and I do hate being alone and tend to expend a lot of energy taking care of the people around me (and yes, to the detriment of my own health... a year ago, I found myself in crisis).
It's the thinking thing... does feeling mean you don't think? How does that work out anyway?
I am not as goal-oriented as ENTJs seem to be... I have a plan that I then worry and fret won't work because I am not certain I am doing enough because I am communicating with folks on-line, making sure of my long-distance friendships, etc.
So, I guess I am supposed to get out (hee!), but from where I was certain, I feel a degree of... what if...and I'd like some help, if you good folks don't mind.
Heart,
posted by:
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Seattle
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I don't know you at all, but here's my theory: You're really an ENFJ, but you feel for some reason you should be a T. Perhaps it's because you're male? I've had a similar problem -- all the messages that make me think I should be an F, because I'm female. Well, I'm ****ing sick of the shoulds, frankly. They don't work! I want to be who I really am. Screw everyone who thinks I'm not woman enough!
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Nah... because I am a thinker. In fact, I think I think and feel at the same capacity -- equally. BUT... since writing this... I think I am ENFJ... I shifted somewhere. I used to be a kickass ENTJ... but I changed because I needed to be liked so much and bring out the positive in everyone my life touches. Which means, I was probably always an ENFJ, but I'm trying to gloss over that for some reason. Hard to own that you are an emotional person when your head rules your reality.
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